Saturday, March 3, 2012

They're Ruining My Bliss!

Oh, how I love Saturday mornings! Knowing that I have the freedom of a clear not that clear...two baseball practices and a birthday party...but a  few free hours in the morning...(I'll take what I can get.)
 I woke up to a kid's knee in my back. I used the opportunity to get out of bed before the rest of the family and enjoy a quiet cup of coffee and a good book. I settled myself onto the couch, with the morning sun streaming in through the windows, a warm blanket and a hot cup of coffee...pure bliss!  And completely short-lived...15 minutes later, the youngest comes down the stairs, rubbing her eyes and plops next to me on the couch. Really? She can't get up for school on her own, but on a Saturday she can wake up and come downstairs. Figures!

She wants to play a game with me, but I convince her to give me 15 minutes to finish my book and coffee. She agrees and settles down with a book of her own.  Ahh...I am still in bliss!
Short comes the oldest...slowly making his way down the stairs. He throws himself into the over-sized chair next to me and starts telling us about his dream. I listen with one ear, and try to concentrate on finishing my book. It's at the climax, totally exciting and what I have been waiting 300 pages to read! comes the middle son. Staggering down the stairs with a frown on his face. He is pouty and whiny...pissed off that he fell asleep last night before he had a chance to watch the movie he picked out. serenity is broken.

I give up. I move over on the couch and he squishes in next to me. We are packed like sardines...three of us trying to stretch our legs out and share the same afghan. After listening to to his tirade of just how disappointed and terrible his life is, we settle into a game of  "I Spy". OK...this is alright...maybe not the quiet serenity I was hoping for...but fun to have all the kids snuggling together! Or not...soon the little one is kicking her feet, which are between the middle son and I, trying to get the blanket over her toes...this completely irritates the middle kid and he tells her to knock it off. Here it comes...World War III and I am trapped between them! "Stop it!" I think..."you are ruining my bliss!" I calm them down before they escalate further...and we continue the game. Finally the middle son gets up to stretch his legs as the youngest starts to complain that he is not watching her turn! It quickly escalates into a full meltdown as I tell him..."watch your sister!" He comes around behind me, draping his arms around my neck...and sniffles...clearly he needs to blow his nose. He sniffs again. I don't dare risk him leaving to get a tissue and say, "Hey! Don't drip any nose liquid on my head!" "Nose liquid?" Says the oldest. And starts laughing...The other two join in, "You said NOSE LIQUID!" and the giggling ensues. EEK! Now I know I am in for a sprinkling...I take advantage of the good mood and tell him to grab a tissue and blow his nose. Crisis averted...we give up the game and they look for something else to do.

There is a big tub of dinosaurs next to the couch. (Doesn't everyone keep a tub of dinosaurs next to their couch?) The eldest grabs one and pushes the button to make it roar. "Shh..." I say, "You'll wake up your Dad." PING! I hear the lightbulb over my head light up...They'll wake up their Dad...yes...he should share in all this bliss with me. "Grab a dinosaur you guys...let's sneak up and wake your Dad with them." They all are  game as we go giggling up the stairs, dinos in hand. We creep into the darkened an EMPTY bed! Dang it! Where is he? The bathroom! We can hear him moving around and station ourselves outside the door. They are unable to suppress the giggling and unless he lost his hearing overnight, he knows we are there. The door slowly opens and the kids shove their roaring dinosaurs through the opening, just as he comes roaring out the door! Screams, laughter, shrieks..."RUN!" I say as I lead the way down the stairs.

We run to the family room..."grab a blanket," I say, "Hide!" The kids throw themselves on the large sectional, panicking that they'll be seen,  as I cover them with blankets. I grab one for myself and throw it over my head as we wait. "Here he comes," I tell them. Everyone holds their breath as he walks into the room.  "Ahhh..." he says as he lays down on top of the kids. "EEEK" come the shrieks..."DAAAD!" Blankets are kicked off and laughter and shrieking continue. YES! Their attention has been diverted...can I make my escape?

I might as well forget it. There is laundry to practices to get ready for...A birthday present to wrap...muffins to bake, yard work....So much for my quiet bliss...

1 comment:

  1. I, too, am confused about the Saturday morning early rising phenomenon. Hmmmm. Sounds like you guys created a different kind of bliss -- what a great family!!