The Early Riser...

"Hey Mom, do you have an alarm clock I can use?" asks my 11 year old son. "Sure..." I say, "are you going to get yourself up in the morning?" "Yep," he tells me. I rummage around in the cupboard and bring him the travel alarm clock. "Where do you want it?" I ask. Since he has a loft bed, I suggest putting it on the bed or right next to it. "No..., I want it across the room so I will have to get out of bed and turn it off," he says, "otherwise I might just turn it off and go back to sleep!" Wow...this kid has really thought it out!

I set the time and get it all set. "OK Mom, will you set the alarm for me?" Sure, I say, "What time?" "Better make it 4:30," he announces. WHAT? "Well, I want to get up really early, get dressed, eat breakfast, make my lunch and then play video games before school."  Uhhh...there's logic in that...but 4:30am?  "You know it's dark out at 4:30 in the morning, right?" I explain, "And that is just way too early to get up...how about 6:00?" He stares at me a moment..."How about 5:00?"  We finally settle on 5:30am and he promises not to wake me up.

I didn't sleep well that night...anticipating hearing his alarm and having to get up to turn it off. At 6:20am, my alarm goes off and I get up to see if my eldest is up and playing video games.  Hmm...not in his room...not in the playroom...I head downstairs...the lights are so bright, I have to shield my eyes. The kid has every single light on in every room. Lamps, overhead lights...BRIGHT! I stumble through the entryway, turning off lights as I go and make my way to the kitchen. His lunchbox is open and on the island...a bag of crackers and a muffin are tucked neatly inside...clearly he started making his lunch. The TV is on and there on the couch sits the eldest child...."Good morning!" I say. "Oh, hey mom...good morning," comes the reply. I look at the clock..."Hey...you know it's just about 6:30 and I am going to go wake up your brother and sister. What time did you get up?" "OMIGOSH!" he yelps as he jumps over the back of the couch, "I got up at 5:30!! I got dressed, ate breakfast and started to make my lunch...but I got distracted!!" (well..this isn't much of a shock)  He looks at me in anguish.  "It's OK," I tell him, "Go upstairs and play your video games until it's time to get ready to leave. I will  finish making your lunch." Relief sweeps over his face and he gives me a quick hug and a "thanks mom" and bounds up the stairs.

I worry about him all day...thinking how tired he must be, getting up so early. But he was fine when he came home...and he proceeded to do the early thing for the rest of the week. He decided to help me one day, by waking up his brother and sister for me...with his new trombone.   He snickered to himself as he stood outside of brother's room...and then he let go with a loud blast in his brother's direction. I grabbed the camera and snapped a photo as I heard the middle son yell, "OK, OK, I hear you!! ENOUGH!" Little sister calls out, "I am already up so I don't care if you blow that thing!" We all have a good laugh...well, not the brother who got woken up...he was kind of crabby for the rest of the morning...hey...if you can't take a joke...

I am starting to like this early morning thing the kid has going. Maybe I will get up and work out at 5:30AM...  (HA, HA, HA! Whew...good one!)  But by day five, he has pooped out. The alarm went off at 5:30am...but the kid didn't hear it. Neither did I...but Daddy did and staggered into the kid's room at 6:00, after listening to it for half an hour. By Saturday, the early morning idea is long forgotten...I am eager to sleep in...the one day I can...Of course I wake up automatically at 6:30am...as did the dog, who panted and danced around, making it impossible for me to ignore him and go back to sleep. Thank goodness I went to bed early. (well, early for me!)  And the two little ones were up...but no eldest child and no Daddy...I guess the week of getting up early caught up with him. Wonder if this is it...if it has ended...I guess I we'll see what the school week brings.  All I know is that I need more coffee!

Birthday party...in the RAIN?

It's the middle son's birthday today. He is eight. And planning his party has been so traumatic...for me..  Poor kid hasn't really had a big birthday party...seems like the oldest had big parties from ages one through nine. (opting for a small slumber party last year that caused me to cower in the backyard with an adult beverage.) The kids were so obnoxious that my husband refused to come in the house...he was ready to put them in the car and drive them home...slowing down just enough to let them out in front of their houses!  But I digress...

So this year I thought I would do it up BIG for our poor little middle child. "Invite everyone in your class," I said, feeling magnanimous. "You can even invite the neighbor kids and other kids at school..."...The guest list hit 30 and I didn't flinch. We decided on the big park not far from our house. "Genius!" my husband called me. Park rental: $59.00...LEGO party invitations, complete with a mini figure for the goody bags plus thank you cards...$20 for 10 (x3).  OK...so that cost me $60. Still...I was looking for the least amount of work for me, with the least cost.

I checked the weather forecast...March can be iffy, where weather is concerned. The almanac assured me that we would have a sunny day with 73'F weather. Good enough for me! Invitations went out and the responses started coming in. I was so excited for our boy. He was going to have a big party with all his friends. What better place than the park? They can run, climb on the structures, climb the rock wall...hit the picnic tables where I and the other parents would be sitting...chatting and laughing...watching our little darlings. I would have snacks and drinks for them...it all would be so perfect!

The husband and I watched the extended weather reports every day. One week before the party and the weather forecast remained favorable. And then it happened! What's this? "Chance of rain?" Oh..just 25% chance...that's nothing.  The next day...50% chance of rain. I could feel the slight tinge of worry...but it was OK...I still had 6 days... Every day the report changed..finally vacillating between 70% chance and 30% chance. Other parents and friends started to join in on the weather watch. One was doing the "reverse" Indian Rain Dance...another was singing the rain away. At pick up time at school, they would tell me the chance of rain...all of us pulling for a sunny day!

By Thursday, just three days before the party, the forecast showed heavy rain on Saturday (day before party). "We can't have the party at the park, if it rains all day Saturday," I told my husband. "Sure we can," he said in a positive voice. "No, all the equipment will be wet," I lamented. "No it won't....because I will be there Sunday morning drying everything with towels!" He wasn't kidding. I could see him calculating how many towels it would take and if I would notice all the beach towels missing....He even said he would rake the sand to get the water to drain...(this is a desperate man...)

Having 20-30 kids in our house plus 20 parents...in the rain...is not an option. I can barely stand my three kids and the dog in this house...they get so loud! And there isn't room to put that many people...so stress levels were high as we watched and waited on the weather. I started looking into options...Bounce house place, bowling alley, fitness centers...all were either so expensive for a big group like ours...or 30 minutes away. I didn't want to make our guests drive...and was looking for the most cost-effective plan. (which would be the PARK!) After looking at the prices, my husband said, "you know...I've been walking around the house and I think we can have it here...I will block off a few rooms, put another TV in the playroom and 12 kids can play video games!!"  He looked so proud, having just come up with a solution. I could feel my hands acting independently of my body as they reached up to grasp his neck in a choke hold...

I thought about all the CLEANING, shoving stuff into bags and throwing them into the garage and then having to come up with GAMES and prizes and food. "NOOOO!" I quickly dissuaded him from that idea, ticking off a list of ALL the things that would need to be accomplished (having the carpets cleaned, hand washing the walls, the cabinets, hanging all the pictures that I have neglected to do, cleaning the kids' rooms...it would be nice to see the floor in our daughter's room) and the cost of food, games, drinks, prizes, etc. would equal the cost of going somewhere else. House was off-limits!

By Friday, all the of Saturday's Little League opening day festivities were cancelled due to the impending rain. The forecast showed 100% chance of rain for Sunday and we were running out of time and options. The local skating rink seemed the best idea...My husband asked me to try and convince our young son to postpone the party. "Bribe him with Legos!" he exclaimed. I knew it wouldn't work. Last year, we had his birthday party on April 18th...almost a month after his birthday...I didn't remember that...but HE sure did! He's been talking about it for months..."I don't want my party in April...like you did LAST year!" he would tell me, "My birthday is in MARCH!" UGH...how in the world does that kid remember that? I didn't remember the exact date! I am pretty sure he has a photographic memory...he's still mad at me for the time when he was 3 and I reached out for him as he ran by and accidentally tore his shirt..."Remember when you ripped my shirt? That was my FAVORITE shirt!" I'm sure he will need years of therapy over that one...

With the confirmed guest list at 22 and two days to spare, we booked the local skating rink. The cost is greater, but the stress level is low...all we do is show up with our goody bags and cake! And money...

The kid has had a great birthday so far....breakfast in bed...Don't be impressed...it was a donut. The Legos and video games he wanted...an ice cream cake (his favorite) and dinner at his favorite burger joint...you know the place with the 800 calorie burgers! (great...) The big rain storm has not appeared. It BETTER rain tomorrow...but of course it won't...it would only rain if I booked the park and was set up out there. Now that we are going to be indoors...it will be sunny...I know it. My husband knows it. That is the way it goes for us...so shine all you want, sun...I don't care...what's done is done...I'm going to enjoy the skating rink...we'll try the park for the next party...a summer party...and hope that it isn't 100 degrees out...

They're Ruining My Bliss!

Oh, how I love Saturday mornings! Knowing that I have the freedom of a clear schedule...OK...so not that clear...two baseball practices and a birthday party...but a  few free hours in the morning...(I'll take what I can get.)

 I woke up to a kid's knee in my back. I used the opportunity to get out of bed before the rest of the family and enjoy a quiet cup of coffee and a good book. I settled myself onto the couch, with the morning sun streaming in through the windows, a warm blanket and a hot cup of coffee...pure bliss!  And completely short-lived...15 minutes later, the youngest comes down the stairs, rubbing her eyes and plops next to me on the couch. Really? She can't get up for school on her own, but on a Saturday she can wake up and come downstairs. Figures!

She wants to play a game with me, but I convince her to give me 15 minutes to finish my book and coffee. She agrees and settles down with a book of her own.  Ahh...I am still in bliss!
Short lived...here comes the oldest...slowly making his way down the stairs. He throws himself into the over-sized chair next to me and starts telling us about his dream. I listen with one ear, and try to concentrate on finishing my book. It's at the climax, totally exciting and what I have been waiting 300 pages to read! And...here comes the middle son. Staggering down the stairs with a frown on his face. He is pouty and whiny...pissed off that he fell asleep last night before he had a chance to watch the movie he picked out. UGH...my serenity is broken.

I give up. I move over on the couch and he squishes in next to me. We are packed like sardines...three of us trying to stretch our legs out and share the same afghan. After listening to to his tirade of just how disappointed and terrible his life is, we settle into a game of  "I Spy". OK...this is alright...maybe not the quiet serenity I was hoping for...but fun to have all the kids snuggling together! Or not...soon the little one is kicking her feet, which are between the middle son and I, trying to get the blanket over her toes...this completely irritates the middle kid and he tells her to knock it off. Here it comes...World War III and I am trapped between them! "Stop it!" I think..."you are ruining my bliss!" I calm them down before they escalate further...and we continue the game. Finally the middle son gets up to stretch his legs as the youngest starts to complain that he is not watching her turn! It quickly escalates into a full meltdown as I tell him..."watch your sister!" He comes around behind me, draping his arms around my neck...and sniffles...clearly he needs to blow his nose. He sniffs again. I don't dare risk him leaving to get a tissue and say, "Hey! Don't drip any nose liquid on my head!" "Nose liquid?" Says the oldest. And starts laughing...The other two join in, "You said NOSE LIQUID!" and the giggling ensues. EEK! Now I know I am in for a sprinkling...I take advantage of the good mood and tell him to grab a tissue and blow his nose. Crisis averted...we give up the game and they look for something else to do.

There is a big tub of dinosaurs next to the couch. (Doesn't everyone keep a tub of dinosaurs next to their couch?) The eldest grabs one and pushes the button to make it roar. "Shh..." I say, "You'll wake up your Dad." PING! I hear the lightbulb over my head light up...They'll wake up their Dad...yes...he should share in all this bliss with me. "Grab a dinosaur you guys...let's sneak up and wake your Dad with them." They all are  game as we go giggling up the stairs, dinos in hand. We creep into the darkened bedroom...to an EMPTY bed! Dang it! Where is he? The bathroom! We can hear him moving around and station ourselves outside the door. They are unable to suppress the giggling and unless he lost his hearing overnight, he knows we are there. The door slowly opens and the kids shove their roaring dinosaurs through the opening, just as he comes roaring out the door! Screams, laughter, shrieks..."RUN!" I say as I lead the way down the stairs.

We run to the family room..."grab a blanket," I say, "Hide!" The kids throw themselves on the large sectional, panicking that they'll be seen,  as I cover them with blankets. I grab one for myself and throw it over my head as we wait. "Here he comes," I tell them. Everyone holds their breath as he walks into the room.  "Ahhh..." he says as he lays down on top of the kids. "EEEK" come the shrieks..."DAAAD!" Blankets are kicked off and laughter and shrieking continue. YES! Their attention has been diverted...can I make my escape?

I might as well forget it. There is laundry to do...baseball practices to get ready for...A birthday present to wrap...muffins to bake, yard work....So much for my quiet bliss...

My Keys are Where?

This morning was a great morning. The kids and I were buzzing right along with an unheard of amount of efficiency! They were dressed and downstairs in record time! Well...the boys were...the girl...she is slower...much slower...They ate breakfast, shoes on...everything in a timely manner. I was even ready to go (if wearing sweatpants, no make up and running a comb through my hair constitutes being "ready"...)

Boys were in the car, I hustled the little one out...after two trips to the bathroom and a forgotten Dr. Seuss book...I grabbed my cup of coffee, spilled it all over the driver's seat, cleaned up the coffee, and got in the car. OH...forgot to grab my keys...went back in, reached for my keys on the hook...no keys. Where are my keys? Must be in my purse. Back to the car, rifle through my purse...huh...no keys. That's odd...OK...back in the house...tear apart laundryroom...no keys. Back to the car...look under the seats...no keys. The kids are getting antsy..."Mom...can't you find your keys? Maybe Dad has them!"  Good thought! I text husband...he calls...says he doesn't have them. After 10  more minutes of my freaking out and rummaging through the house, I give up. Tell the kids go get out of the car and come inside. We are obviously not making it to school in a timely manner. We are late. We are stranded!

The youngest is crying. She really wants to go to school. She is Star of the Week...it's a big deal. She is "line leader"...and they have chapel this morning...she loves chapel. All the singing...it's right up her alley. I feel terrible and I am frustrated beyond belief. What the heck? Today isn't MONDAY! This is a Monday-thing! I am NOT this disorganized! We were going to be EARLY to school! ARGH!!

The kids come in and join me in our "treasure" hunt. "Run your hands under the cushions on the couch," I tell the oldest. "I will look in your room!" announces the middle son. "I am looking in your purse!" says the youngest, as she dumps the contents out on the floor. (no use telling her I already did that...) I look under the couch, under the chair....up to my room...look in the pockets of the pants I wore yesterday. Hmm...I guess they could be in the hamper...I know they are not, but I dig through it anyway. (Wow! I really need to do my laundry...)

I am convinced my husband has the keys. I just know it. They are probably in his car, just sitting there! He may say he doesn't have them, but that is the only logical explanation. I mean..really...like I would misplace them? I scoff at such a thought! He has them and doesn't know it!

We exhaust every possible location and finally give up. Now what? I need to get these kids to school...who can I call? I call my friend and workout buddy, Anne. "I have a huge favor to ask you," I say. "Okaaay..." I can hear the trepidation in her voice. "It's HUGE!" I say. "Alright..." I can feel her fear through the phone. "I can't find the keys to my car and I need to get the kids to school. Can you come get us and take us to school?" "Sure!" she says in laughter. "I'm on my way!" I call the school. "We are having car trouble," I tell the secretary, "we will be there!" "On no! Car trouble?" she inquires. "Yes...you see...if you cannot find your car keys, the car will not start...therefore we are having car trouble!" I explain. "Oh...I understand," she says with a laugh. I assure her that I have called for a ride and we will be there in a half hour.

I take the car seats out of the car and put them on the driveway. I stack up the backpacks and lunch boxes...and we wait for our ride. I continue to look for the keys...frustrated beyond belief! I can't believe that I can't find the keys!! This hasn't happened before! Oh sure....I misplace my keys, my cellphone, my wallet, my jacket...but I always find them. Well...except the time I lost my phone at Legoland...but that was an unfortunate byproduct of an emergency bathroom-run with one of the kids!

Our rescuer, Anne, soon arrives. Big smile on her face, she unlocks the doors so I can load the car seats. She is trying to refrain from laughing hysterically. It's written all over her face. She's a good friend...she holds it in. We load up the kids and away we go! We get to school, the kids unload, we go to the office for our quite-familiar tardy slips. The secretary is kind, as the oldest exclaims..."My mom couldn't find her car keys! We had to call for a ride!" (nice one) She suppresses a giggle and quickly hands out the notes. I deliver the kids to where they need to be and my friend takes me home.

We retrace the last time I had my keys. "I got home, grabbed the discarded uniform (youngest had a play-date and changed clothes in the car) from the car and threw it in the laundry room, put away my purse, hung up the jackets," I explained. "Maybe the keys are on the floor of the laundry room," she offers. "No...I would have heard them fall....WAIT! There is a rug in there...maybe I wouldn't hear them." We go into the laundry room and I pick up each article of clothes, one by one. Nothing under the first one...or the second...or the third...as I lift up the last piece, there are my keys!!

NOOOOO! They were there the whole time?! My husband DIDN'T take them to work? The dog didn't bury them in the yard? I misplaced them? If I had just picked up those clothes, I would have found them and the kids wouldn't have been late to school? DANG! I hate it when it is my fault! Oh well...at least I won't be stranded for the rest of the day, begging friends and family to pick the kids up from school...I have my keys and I know EXACTLY where they are...now, where did I put my phone...?

Friday Night Fun?

Third day of no sweets and I want a cookie so bad, I feel like a crack addict on the 1st day of rehab! The fact that I have six...yes, SIX boxes of Girl Scout Cookies in the house, is not helping! Lent has started and I always like to give something up...and also to do something...this year I have given up sweets and every day I am trying to do little random acts of kindness.

I'm not sure which is harder...the no sweets thing or finding things to do for people. It started out easy...Kids and I were at Target, saw a stray shopping cart and put it away. Of course, then the next kid had to find a stray cart and put it away...which meant I had to scour the parking lot for another cart for the little one...which took some time and freaked some people out, who thought we were stalking them...which we were...

The next day I was at the grocery store, looking at the market flowers. Another woman picked out some flowers and I gave her the plastic sleeve thing that she needed, so the flowers wouldn't drip everywhere... This morning I helped a friend deliver something to her kids at school...but what do I do when I can't find something?

I thought about that as I walked up to the glass doors of a department store. I could see an older woman walking towards the doors, right at me. "Oh good," I thought to myself, "I will open the door and hold it for her." But what does she do? She sees me and makes a sharp turn towards the OTHER set of doors! What the heck? HEY LADY! Can't you see I'm trying to do a good deed? Get back here! As these thoughts were streaming through my head, I pictured myself throwing open the door, stalking over to her and strong-arming her through the door. Guess that really wouldn't qualify as an act of kindness...

I wish I could give up something that I really don't like...driving the kids to school...picking the kids up from school...housework...making school lunches....laundry...trying to think what to cook for dinner...hmm...this list could get very long! Oh...cleaning toilets...Seriously...I think I either need to write the boys a letter:  "Dear Boys, please aim for the large white thing in the middle of the room. Please do NOT aim for the floor, the cupboards, the trash can, the shower curtain" ...OR I could paint the toilet red with a white seat...maybe they will think it's a big bullseye... Regardless...I just don't like cleaning it...

Even though Monday was a holiday...this has been a long week. Oh...Monday was a holiday...the kids were home...this HAS been a long week! So glad it's Friday...of course that presents a whole new set of issues...the kids think they can stay up as long as they want...it's the weekend! After 2 hours of after dinner playing, they have agreed to sleep in the playroom together and watch a movie. My husband sends them up to clean the playroom. "I didn't mess it up, Dad!" complains the oldest. And it's true...it was the younger ones..."OK, go find something else to do, stay out of their way," says Dad. He sets the younger ones to picking up the room, so that there is some floor space to sleep on. Soon, I hear the thump and then wail and here comes the youngest. The middle son is close on her heels. This can only mean one of two things...either he is concerned about his sister....or he caused the crying and is coming down to defend himself...you never know with him..sometimes he hides...

She has fallen over some miscellaneous crap on the floor and hurt her back on some kind of bucket...I think...hard to decipher through the sobbing.  After consoling her, I carry her back upstairs and find myself helping them put things away. The Monopoly game seems to have taken a few hits tonight...box broken, a game piece is missing...money is scattered all over the room. I stay upstairs with them and get things put away. We are done! I tell the kids to go get their pillows and blankets. The little one says she has a hurt spot on her face and runs downstairs to have Dad put something on it...the eldest is missing from his room, I assume he is downstairs too. The middle son and I wait patiently for their return. "I wish they would hurry up," he says, "I really like this movie." I go downstairs to check on them and my husband says, they will be up in 10 minutes...they are watching some gold mining show... "Hurry up , I say, your brother is waiting. Ten minutes later, they are ready. I go up to start the movie and the middle son is alseep. OUT! Poor kid...figures. Now the oldest says he is too tired and goes to his room...and here comes the little one..crying and whining...she doesn't want to be alone in the playroom... And so goes my night... I remember when Friday nights meant going out. Now they mean no homework, sleeping in the next day and juggling the kids. So glad I didn't give up wine for Lent...I think a nice Merlot will do...