The Nightly Routine

It dawns on my that the title of my blog is a bit misleading...it's not all "Why MOMMY drinks"...it could also be "Why Wifey Drinks"...!
I have the greatest husband ever! Hands down...he is the best! But like all good marriages, there are the little things... Take for example...I am a night owl...I either like to write or I like to stretch out on the couch and watch one of my programs after the kids have gone to bed. The husband usually can't hang past 11:00 pm...but if I can make it to midnight, my second wind kicks in and I am ready to do some chores!

Oftentimes, my husband will poop out and head to bed. "I've got your water," he will say over his shoulder as he heads for the stairs. (Yes, he brings a glass of water up to our room for me...every night...ever since I was pregnant with the kids...I think he forgot that I can carry my own water now...shh...)  So when he does this, I assume that the house is secure. I mean, isn't that the man's job? To secure the house and protect the occupants inside? To lock the house and protect his FAMILY? Am I right on this? (just nod your heads...)

Now, there are nights when my second wind is a no-show and I fall asleep on the couch. (every night).  TV blaring, lights blazing and I am sitting up with my neck in a weird position. I am disoriented and confused when I wake up. I look at the television and it's always some weird infomercial. I struggle to get my eyes open, and finally drag my carcass from the couch and stagger around the room turning off lights.

The dog needs to go out and I go to unlock the back door. Oh wait! I don't need to unlock it...it isn't locked! ARGH! I have been laying on the couch being burglar-bait for hours! That is a little unsettling... but now I have to check all the doors. Garage door...locked. Oh, looky here...front door is unlocked too! Maybe Mr. Burglar Man can bring a friend and he can come through the front door while the other burglar goes through the back and then we can all meet in the kitchen for snacks!! Yep...driving me to drink!

I go around and lock all the doors and head up the stairs to bed.  As I walk in my room, I can see there is an extra person in my bed...and if I get in bed, then there won't be much room for me! I love having the kids sleep with us...in theory...kind of depends on which kid we get. The oldest is like a colt...all knees and elbows, and I know he's there as I get a knee to the back.  The middle child likes to talk in his sleep (which can be quite entertaining) and tends to grind his teeth, which is about the equivalent of fingernails scraping down the chalkboard. And then there is the youngest..at first she is so cute, snuggling up with me. But then she stretches out and does a complete starfish, leaving no room for me... I try to stick out as long as I can...but eventually, I am right back on the couch.  At least now the lights are off and I can get some good sleep...oh wait...is that the sun? Time to get up...Dang...guess my drink will be some strong coffee!